Thursday, May 14, 2015

Stop Skipping Rocks into the Lake of Fire

I'm tired of this watered down Christianity. I'm tired of being told everyone can just come as they are and be as they are and stay as they are.

Yes, come as you are. Jesus accepts you as you are, wherever you are, however you are, He meets you in your place.

But He does not expect you to stay there.

Come as you are. Don't stay as you are. Don't be as you are. Grow. Change. Repent.

If you don't want to change, don't need to change, don't need a Saviour, then why are you coming? You NEED a Saviour. And as much as He says to come "just as you are" He also tells you to "Go and sin no more".

This doesn't mean that Christians are perfect. No one is expecting perfection. But I also don't believe our Saviour died on the Cross for you to continue to wallow in the mud-pit of your sin. He didn't die for your sin so you could enjoy the temporary satisfaction that comes from living in your sin right now, He died for your sins so you could forego that life, you could break free from your sins, you can experience life more abundantly than you've ever known here on this earth, and then when the time is come you can live with Him forever in Eternity! Can I get a witness?!?

I am sick and tired of hearing my fellow Christians telling people they don't have to change, they can come as they are. It's certainly true if you are addressing a lost person, asking them to meet Jesus, Jesus will meet them where they are no matter what. But for those of us who claim to be in Christ? He has called us to something higher, something more.

I am tired of feeling good. I am bored of being told I'm fine because the person next to me is sinning too, and we're all sinners, and no one is better than anyone else, so I should just be fine with it.

That's right... I'm tired of feeling good. I long to be stretched. Challenged. My God calls me to be better than I was before. Better today than I was yesterday. Better yesterday than I was last year. I am tired of sitting stagnant in the mediocrity of lukewarm Christianity.  I'm not trying to be better than you. I'm trying to be better than me. I'm on my journey.

But I want you to be better too. God has called you to so much more than continuing in a life of sin. God has called you to be so much more and it saddens me to see you content to wallow in your sin and your comfort and your pride, refusing to let go of what you know is keeping you from knowing Him more deeply, simply because it's comfortable, because it feels good.

My Saviour was beaten and scarred, and bled and hung on a cross and died to save us from the pits of Hell! To save us from the burning Lake of Fire! Why do we insist on skipping rocks from its shores?!?

Do you not know from where you have been saved? Do you not realize the eternity you have been rescued from? Do you not know that you are more than you are doing right now? Why do you insist on living your old life? Lay down your sins. Lay them down.

Will it be scary? Maybe. Will it be uncomfortable? Probably. Will you regret it? Never!

I am tired of pretending that I'm okay. I am sick, so I need the Healer. I am broken, so I need made Whole. I am tired, so I need Rest. When we pretend that we are okay, when we trick ourselves into believing that we are okay, we cheat ourselves out of the miraculous Power that God has to transform our lives. We settle for a brand of cheap imitation Christianity instead of the cost of the real thing, for as much as it cost Christ His life, it costs us ours as well. We cannot claim to be in Christ and continue in our old lives day after day. Either we have never truly accepted Christ as our Saviour and Lord, or we are spending each day in torment as we are convicted by the Holy Spirit.

My fellow Christians, I beg of you to examine your life. Are you holding on to sin? Have you convinced yourself that you're okay, when deep down you know you're not? Let us stop playing in the dirt like the children we were and begin living our lives as the men & women that God has called us to be.

Saturday, February 7, 2015

2014 Recap

* I originally wrote this in January, but apparently never hit "publish", so here goes*

So a quick recap of 2014:

March:
- Jason's business kicked off it's 2nd season


April:
- my employer announced that it will be closing the Kentucky location within the next 3 years and all jobs will be relocated. Mine specifically is going to Michigan.

May:
- Miss Jillian was born
- Miss Jena graduated from Kindergarten
- my parents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary

July:
- we made a decision regarding both my job and Jena's education

August:
- after more than 10 years with my employer, I resigned my position

September:
- we began homeschooling Jena

October:
- our family's first trip to Disney World
- a trip to Chicago

November:
- Jason expands his business to include Christmas light installation (residential & commercial)

December:
- holidays (need I say more)

Friday, February 6, 2015

Our Stance on Vaccines

Because why not post on a hot topic and piss some people off, right?

I research each and every vaccine myself. Here's the background:

I was pregnant with Jena and was given the CDC info sheets for the vaccines they want her to get right away. One of them (I think Hepatitis B), had stats that didn't sit right with me for some reason. Took me a while to figure out. Then I realized. They presented some numbers as percentages, some as fractions, and some as raw numbers. Having spent years at my job making various numbers-based presentations to executives, I know this trick well: you present it in whichever format spins your story the best. Any time you see a report, news article, etc. with numbers presented in multiple fashions, it should be a red flag that they are trying to sell you something. And so I began digging. I just wanted to see for myself.

Think back to math class. Probably late elementary school timing. One of the basic rules of comparing numbers is that to do an accurate comparison you have to get them in the same format. This is when you learn to convert fractions to percentages and vice versa. It is literally elementary school level math. And both sides are using it to their advantage on a regular basis.

It was hard for me to find legitimate info at first. The problem being that the vast majority of sites out there are either very pro-get-every-vaccine-exactly-on-schedule or very-don't-trust-any-vaccine-and/or-the-schedule. Which means they're all spinning the numbers one way or another. So I went to the source.

I now pull all of my stats from the CDC, FDA, and WHO sites. I read manufacturers inserts. When I can I read the policies for those vaccines for other 1st world countries. If there is a difference in recommendation, I try to find out why.

I will tell you that some of this information is VERY hard to find. Which is VERY frustrating to me. I get even more flustered when I can find a stat on one vaccine then can't find it on another. It happens. I'm irritated that the wording is different from one to another. For example, sometimes "death" is lumped in with all serious complications. Other times it is its own entry. These inconsistencies and lack of transparency are perhaps the largest red flags to me.

The end result: we do get the majority of vaccines, and on schedule. We skip a few when the data to support it just isn't there.

I am not an "anti-vaxxer". I am not a "pro-vaxxer". I am a question everything kind of person. I am the kind of person who wants to see for herself. I encourage everyone, no matter what side of the issue you are on, is (if you haven't already) to do your own research. Don't be a sheeple (I love that term).

I'm not going to put our decision regarding specific vaccines on this post (although I think for Jena it's been mentioned before). For a long time I've wanted to publish the numbers and information as I pull them for each individual vaccine, so I'm going to make a concerted effort to do so in the future, lay the numbers out for you, and hopefully help my readers make a more informed decision regarding the care of their families, no matter what they decide.

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Socialization? Really?

** disclaimer: while we decided that we felt homeschooling was the right decision for our family at this time, I truly believe that there is no one "right" answer for educating your children, and each family must decide for themselves which route is best for their children, be it public school, private school, or homeschooling. They are all equally valid options **

I was recently approached by someone close to me regarding the fact that we are homeschooling Jena. They were asking how she was doing, what was she learning, did she like it. They seemed genuinely impressed at what she was learning, and shocked that she liked "school".

Why?

Because all four children in their family, ranging from Kindergarten thru 4th grade, all attending public school, ALL of them hate going to school. Dread it. Can't stand it. Hate school.

They find it odd, they said. Usually you hear of one kid hating school. Or one kid loving school. And most kids somewhere in between. But all four of them HATE it, and they're looking for answers, so they decided to question me about homeschooling.

So, by his own admission, all four of the children in his family absolutely HATE school. I think we can all agree that if you dislike something that much, you probably aren't doing your best work or reaching your full potential either.

In his frustration with their current school situation, he chooses to approach me to ask questions about homeschool. Seems impressed with what she is learning and how she is doing, and especially with the fact that she LIKES school and learning.

So of course let's argue that my daughter's not getting properly socialized {{ head desk }}

He brought it up gently, as if he were genuinely concerned for Jena. I pointed out all the different activities Jena was currently participating in with her peers:

- Sunday School (coed, all 1st graders, includes children of several different racial / ethnic backgrounds)
- Girl Scouts (all girls, K thru 3rd grade, includes girls of several different racial / ethnic backgrounds)
- play group (coed, age 5 thru 10 [with younger siblings in tow], includes children of several different racial / ethnic backgrounds)
- gym class (coed, age 5 thru 10, includes children with autism, sensory issues, etc)
- science class (coed, age 5 thru 10)

While there is some crossover, each group is a different set of kids with which Jena is building relationships.

He told me that was all well & good, but it's no the same as spending all day every day with the same friends who are all these same age as you.

{{blink, blink, blink}}

He's right. Attending five different activities with five different sets of kids, building friendships with kids in a wider age range is not the same as spending six hours a day, five days a week with the exact same kids, who are all in the same grade, approximately the same age.

I attended public school. While we didn't choose it for Jena at this time, we do still believe it is a viable option. But do not preach to me about how it is a great way to socialize your kids.

Besides, I personally am not making education decisions for my children based on their social life. There are plenty of other opportunities for them to make friends and socialize. I don't have to compromise their education to do so.

Your kids hate school. They aren't doing as well as they could because of it. You're impressed with what my homeschooled child is doing academically. And the ONLY argument you can come up with against it is socialization? Really? Sit down.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Today has been hard

I was first awakened at 3:30am.

My husband woke me to kiss me goodbye at 6am as he headed off to work.

At 6:45am my youngest decided it was time to get up for breakfast. My oldest awoke at 7:15am.

By 7:30am the baby was going back down for a nap. Exhausted, I crawled back into bed, only for my other charge to interrupt my attempts at sleep roughly every 5 - 10 minutes with random requests for random stuff.

Baby woke up at 8:30am. Screaming. Not falling back to sleep. She's up.

So far today I have had baby food sneezed on me, I have had snot rubbed on my shoulder. I have stepped in spaghetti sauce and baby food and am not sure how either ended up on the floor.

I have listened to an infant cry and sob and scream for the better part of three hours no matter what I did. Is she getting sick? Is she teething? Growth spurt? All three? Who knows. All I know is she's miserable.

I have told my older daughter 'no' what seems like 50 times already today, because I have to meet the demands of the tiniest in the house, and I wish there were some way to express to her how much I hate telling her 'no' so much. I wish she knew that I hate it almost as much as she does and I would love to do everything she asks. But I can't.

I have cried. I have yelled. I haven't laughed. Not many smiles today.

Today has been hard.

I strapped the baby in the high chair long enough to microwave the 6 year old some lunch and put together some baby food and a bottle for the little one.

I managed to scarf down my own microwaved meal when I finally got the baby to bed over an hour later, after she'd been awake for nearly five hours of crying.

Yesterday I spent the day trying to attend to the issues my oldest has been having lately. It's been rough around here the past few months. Really rough. So I dedicated all of yesterday to her. All of it.

I haven't showered in over 48 hours. Haven't done laundry or dishes or any other household chores in two days. And it shows. Terribly. I just used our last clean bottle. I've re-used our last clean baby spoon. So it's not really clean any more. We haven't even had time to do homeschool in two days. Thank goodness she's ahead in the curriculum. Buys us some leeway.

Today has been hard. And it's just past lunch time.

I am tired. On the verge of tears. Today has been hard.
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