Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Farewell... sort of

Well, I feel it's time to close down this blog.

I've been working on another project, and while it's far from finished, it's ready for me to share with you.

I've started another blog, but one that's on a different path from this one.

I wanted an outlet for me to express my views on current events, politics, hot topics, etc freely and that is the basis of my new blog.

I hope to also find a place to share the occasional post on parenting, homeschooling, marriage, life, etc. but those topics will not be the foundation of my writing.

What I'm trying to say is that it is going to be a bit more opinionated than you're used to reading on here, so may not be what you're looking for. Or maybe it'll suit you just fine. I suppose only time will tell.

So, without further ado, here's the link to my new project:




Thank you to those of you who have followed me and read my posts for all this time now. I really appreciate it. Look for my new blog identity out in blogger land!

Enjoy!

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Hello!

Well, hello there!

What can I tell you? So much, yet so little has happened in the past two months since I've written.

Jena is doing extremely well in 2nd grade. As you may remember we are homeschooling her. My biggest struggle right now is keeping her challenged and engaged. I think I've mentioned on here before that she is gifted, and it seems like I am constantly being shown exactly how intellectually gifted she is.

By her age, she should be in 1st grade. She is instead flying thru 2nd grade. We attended a co-op during the Fall, but even even at a 2nd grade level, she was so far ahead of what was being taught that it basically ended up being purely social for her. That, combined with how hard the day was on Jillian (and consequently myself), and we decided to pull out of the co-op for next session.

Most recently I let Jena test ahead (again) in Language Arts and Arithmetic. She was able to skip 22 lessons before she got less than an "A" on the test. Twenty two. Just over a month's worth. Just blazed thru it.

Her only struggle area is handwriting, but she has improved massively since last year. It's like something just "clicked" this year, most likely her fine motor skills, LOL.

She does do enrichment classes at a local education center once per week, lots of science & art mostly. That definitely helps.

For those with curriculum / educational philosophy knowledge, we have been doing a traditional curriculum for Language Arts & Arithmetic, with Social Studies & Science being more unit studies. I'm starting to look at integrating more classical education philosophies / activities into our schooling, as I think how she learns may lean more that way. We'll see how it goes. One of the lovely things about homeschooling is that we can tailor what & how we teach to our children's needs as we go along.

Which reminds me, I need to adjust our science teaching a bit, since she recently told me that she now wants to be an engineer when she grows up, so she "can design & build machines". Truth be told, we've been saying since she was itty bitty that she would make an excellent engineer, just by the way she looked at the world. I suppose only time will tell.

Jillian (now 20 months) is growing like a weed. Recently started escaping her crib, though not regularly. Another growth spurt though and we're in trouble. She finally started walking at around 18 months. That, combined with a couple of other seemingly minor issues, and I'm beginning to wonder if she has joint issues, specifically hypermobility. Her pediatrician checked her hips & knees at her 15 mo check up because of her delayed walking and said everything looked okay, but I'm considering seeing a specialist just to make sure. My niece has EDS (Ehlers Danlos Syndrome), and didn't get properly diagnosed until she suffered a dislocation of both knees at age 15. My sister has said they wish they'd known earlier because they could have been more careful and while they couldn't prevent the condition itself, they could have helped keep her from being in so much pain & discomfort, especially in the 2+ years she was dealing with back & joint pain before getting a proper diagnosis.

Our family business is doing very well, as evidenced by the fact that I am still a SAHM, LOL. I am so proud of Jason and the work he has done to make the business such a success. Speaking of, right now he is in Mexico on a mission trip, so please pray for his and the team's safety.

I suppose that's about it for now. Thanks for checking in.

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Here Come the Holidays

Ready or not, they are barreling down on us at top speed.

Halloween barely behind us, we've started negotiations on our schedule for Thanksgiving with both sets of in-laws, and Christmas is on its heels.

So what is your holiday schedule like? Ours changes every year. Regretfully. I grew up knowing exactly where we were going to be at what time on every holiday. A decade of being together later, and Jason & I still haven't managed to work that out with our families.

Part of it is that we are working schedules with both sets of in-laws / grandparents. Growing up neither of us dealt with that or saw it dealt with. Other than our household, my family only ever went to my mom's extended family. Jason only ever went to his dad's extended family.

We are blessed to have relationships with both sides, but I have to admit it makes for a stressful holiday season! For me anyway, since I'm usually the one trying to work out the schedules for our little household. Trying to keep everyone happy is hard work! And usually doesn't work anyway! LOL!

So what do you do? How do you work out holiday schedules?

Till next time,

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Has it been three months already?!?

I can't believe it's been nearly three months since my last post. Life has been a whirlwind.

So how about an update on that situation. The side effects of my meds continued to worsen, so after much discussion with my endocrinologist & my husband we decided to discontinue.

So... what next? I have a metabolic disorder. Left untreated the expectation is my weight will balloon rapidly and I will be diabetic within 5-10 years. With my family history, heart disease & arthritis are already losing battles.

So I can try another cocktail of meds, but the truth is I've been on almost everything available over the past 5 years with moderate results. And no matter what they are there is a risk of side effects, many of them serious. You know when your doctor has you sign a waiver... Even prior to my issues I was struggling with my situation being that I was risking my life with side effects to save my life from the disorder. Is that really much of a trade-off?

I can try a liquid diet, hoping the drastic weight loss will lessen my symptoms. It's not permanent, no part of it is covered by my insurance, costs several thousand dollars, sets a bad eating example for my daughters, and even if it's effective in the weight loss will not actually resolve my condition at all, just lessen symptoms and basically buy me time. For what, I'm not sure.

I can try it on my own again. But considering I have been trying (and failing) to lose weight for the past 28 years, know that I have a metabolic disorder that makes it highly unlikely I will succeed without medical intervention... it seems like a recipe for depression & feeling like a failure.

Or I can have major surgery. My endocrinologist thinks I'm an excellent candidate, for a variety of reasons. The surgery he is recommending is 80% effective at treating my condition, and is permanent in 98-99% of those cases. And is likely covered by insurance. But it's surgery. Risks, and recovery, and what-not. Serious crap. So after much discussion with my doctor and my husband, and a lot of soul-searching on my part, we decided this was probably the way to go, and had a lot of peace about the decision... only to find out that my insurance plan does not cover it. I've been given the estimate that cash payment would be upwards of $13,000. Yikes. Not giving up on it yet, in fact I have my first appointment with the surgery center at the hospital tomorrow for an initial consultation, review of my case, etc. I guess we'll see what they have to say.

So right now, for the past 2 months or so, I've done nothing. No meds. Eating what I want (but not over-eating). I've already gained about 10 lbs, and the past week or so I've noticed the puffiness in my face returning that is one of the hallmarks of my disorder (it's water retention). I know I could make drastic changes to my diet & exercise to slow the gain, but I also know from past experience that it's not going to stop it. So I'm going to be really raw & honest with you right now when I tell you that I'm just trying to enjoy myself, love myself, and not worry about food. I'm trying to learn how to dress my body well, accept myself for who I am, and just enjoy my family and enjoy life. We'll see how my appointment goes tomorrow. Maybe I'll get surprise news about payment or something. Maybe we'll win the lottery, LOL. But other than that I'm going to enjoy the next few months and try not to worry about it. We have birthdays, anniversaries, multiple holidays... I just want to enjoy it, you know?

Well, as always, thanks for checking in!

Monday, July 13, 2015

Slowing Down

Recently I realized that I had had a headache for pretty much four days straight that even Tylenol wasn't really helping. I was also hot all the time. One morning it dawned on me to have Jason (as a registered EMT) check my blood pressure.

It wasn't good.

I had a regularly scheduled checkup with my endocrinologist a few days later, so I embarked on a few days of minor lifestyle changes in an effort to lower my blood pressure. One thing I've identified as a cause of stress in my life is that I feel very out of control, so I took some steps to take back some control.

Honestly, in an ironic twist, since becoming a SAHM I feel like I'm doing what everyone else tells me to do, or wants me to do way more than when I worked outside the home. I feel as though I have very little control over my daily motions. So that clearly needs to change.

One thing is that I decided to take a break from FlyLady. Even though it was a program that I chose to start, the truth is that every day I'm doing what she tells me. And at this point even that seems like too much.

I need to do what I want to do.

I also reduced my social media presence, and am actually surprised at how much that has helped, considering I do feel that I get most of my support community from social media. But it's also a constant barrage of contact to an introvert that needs quiet. Heck, I think the truth is we all need quiet at times.

And I made an effort to get at least six hours of sleep a night, which is a struggle for me. I struggle with insomnia, and tend to find after the kids go to bed as my most productive hours, so often find myself up till all hours of the night (morning). 

So I spent a few days relaxing more, letting my house get back to the crappy house it was before, not going online as much, etc.

The result? At my appointment my BP was still high, but not high enough that my doctor was concerned. What he was concerned about was that my resting pulse rate was extremely high. Even though this would be an uncommon side effect to my meds, it is possible, so we are making some modifications to the dosages for a month to see if there's any change, and I'm continuing some of my temporary lifestyle changes. I do plan on starting FlyLady back up soon, but we'll have to see  how things progress.

The truth is I've been struggling with quite a bit of anxiety and depression over the past few months and I think it finally caught up with me. There has been quite a bit going on behind the scenes, both big & small, that has just been difficult to deal with all at once.

While my numbers may not show it (yet?), I feel better about myself since making these changes. I'm going to continue looking at my life and how I can regain control in certain areas. I think that sense of not having control, whether real or perceived, was a major trigger for me, for the anxiety, the depression, and the stress.

Also - my project is still in the works, but delayed a bit by this. Keep watching for more updates!

So that's my update today. I hope you all are doing well.

As always, thanks for checking in!
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